I’m three months old! I have personality now – I look at everything and am startled by sounds easily. I found my hands and put them in my mouth. I drool so much that I have to wear an extra layer to keep from being wet all day. I’m learning how to sleep like a human on the outside sleeps.
Spring was coming. A quick look at my blog from March 2011 provides a snapshot. With hindsight, I know about all the tension under the surface. In terms of pottery, I was leather ware. The fire was coming. I was staunchly in denial of the wrongness of my partnership.
The cycle is typical. I broke down and now I’m refreshed, rejuvenated, and excited. I’m excited to eat right, smaller portions, exercise, stretch, and get out there. I’m excited with ideas I have for community building for myself and my family. I’m excited to be doing yoga twice a week at a studio, excited to be knitting, excited to be writing, cooking, being me. And Salamander? He’s gorgeous, fabulous, perfect. He’s slept from 10pm to 4:30am for the last two nights. It’s awesome, thanks for bearing with me and giving me your suggestions and support. He’s kinda cranky when he wakes up. It’s freaking adorable. He loves having his diaper changed. He smiles and grins like winner. Every time strangers tell me how beautiful he is, I beam. I know [feh] and I made him, but he feels otherworldly, miraculous. He held a rattle for several minutes yesterday. He’s an inspiration.
This little boy’s 5th birthday is in two days. He’s beginning to listen as I tell him about his birth. It’s deeply fun telling him about this being born. I sense that he’s pretty baffled by the outlandish story that he was inside me. After I tell him these stories I find him in another room, pretending he’s a “baby puppy that just hatched from an egg and is on the outside now.” Retelling the story. Working it out. He is still an inspiration; making me want to be the best person I can be, for him and his sister.